My double life
Ssh, don't tell anyone. We're back from the first show, an experience both satisfying and utterly exhausting. There's no question that Justin did far more work than I did, being that he walked around all weekend in the 100+ degree heat with 35 lbs of armor strapped to him. On the other hand, I did my fiar share of getting dragged around in a black velvet dress and leather most of both days. It certainly was a different experience than last year's show during which I had to spend showtimes outside of the Knights area and wasn't actually on the gate lists as a member of the group. I guess I passed the test if there was one.

The Knights have this "buddy system" to prevent confrontations with other fairgoers who occasionally accost the troupe members and challenge them. In order to make sure there's another groupie there to vouch for your actions, each Knight is required at all times to be with another troupe member while outside of the roped off camp area and joust field. Last year I was in a bit of a pickle because I wasn't allowed to escort anyone so whenever I wanted to hang out with Justin someone else had to walk around town with us. Sometimes people told ME I needed to have a buddy, which was a problem seeing as I wasn't allowed to buddy anyone else. This year I was promoted so I didn't have to spend the whole time wandering around by myself and I could actually walk justin to the latrines. Heh.

I don't think I'm on the payroll (it would be nice, wouldn't it?), nor do I particularly think I deserve to be. But it was fun playing a part. This weekend I was Lady Katlin, the ward of Iron Wolf. The tournament was held to auction off the lands of my "mysteriously deceased" father and, in addition, to win my hand in marraige. Of course, everyone was after my land except Justin, who wasn't qualified to fight for me, so he had to hire some creepies to kidnap me and threaten to not give me back unless he won. Needless to say, we were happily reunited both days.

Greenwood is a tough show to work. It's probably the nicest site to camp on because it's so picturesque-- right on the river, plenty of shade. But regardless, it's east of the mountains and in the middle of a fucking desert so it's hot as HELL and sometimes muggier than death. I think it got up to 105 on Saturday. No one fainted from heat stroke, but there were other injuries. One Knight tripped during "Shoot a Knight" (where the kids line up and shoot rubber-tipped arrows at armored knights between acts) and fell onto the edge of his helmet. Twenty stitches. Another threw out a lumbar vertebre during the same activity on Sunday and was laid up the entire day unable to walk. We all had more than a little scare when Lee's horse, spooked by all the activity, decided to rear up and FALL ON HIM before the start of the first act on Sunday. Lee was taken out of the running but had little more than a minor leg injury. The horse got the rest of the day off, too. Thankfully, only very small injuries were caused by the carelessness of another person during combat, so despite the fact that there were so MANY stupid things that happened, no one felt as bad. Justin came away with a cut on his lip from when Paul's sword rebounded off his gorget and caught him in the face. It could have been worse but he's absolutely fine. I managed not to do anything stupid like I did last year when I scarred my calf by impaling my leg on Pete's quillion in a dark pavillion. I still have a mark there. Ouch.

It's nice to be clean and showered after two days being hot and sweaty without bathing. MMM. I don't really have anything to complain about-- not like Dave, anyway. The poor guy is stuck in black clothing, leather plate and chainmail all weekend with a fur hyena head glued to his face ALL DAY. Not to mention he had to haul my ass off the field over his shoulder when they kidnapped me. Dave says he doesn't mind the costume during the day. In fact, he gets so far into his character's psychosis that he forgets all about it. For a REALLY nice guy, he sure goes a bit crazy sometimes. When he ripped one of the $150 full-eye black contacts he bought for his character on Saturday morning he threw a fit like you wouldn't believe. Actually, I might have done the same if I'd just ripped a $150 contact lens. But he got over it just enough to let his angst stew at all the people who asked him if he was a Furry this show. No, Dave is NOT a furry. Biiiiig mistake. Dave is a 250 lb. 6 1/2 ft ex-army man who, despite being one of the sweetest people I know (and managing to NOT look it), has a bit of a THING against certain sexual kinks. Mainly gays and furries. One probably comes from being in the army. The other comes, obviously, from a few years of being hit on by flagrantly yiffy people at faires just because he plays a dog-faced character. It doesn't help that most of the furries who hit on Dave are men either. We had a run-in with a really cute couple at the faire, one of whom was walking the other around with a collar and leash. Dave is also escorted about town on a chain. Not because he "likes" it but rather because the character he plays is supposed to be VERY dangerous when unchained. These two guys just wanted to talk about whose 'pet' was cuter and one of them said he wanted Dave's picture for his "special album." I almost choked laughing. Everyone had a bit of a laugh at Dave's expense on Saturday night at camp. I felt a bit bad for the furries who almost had their heads bitten off by Dave, as Faire is probably one of the only places they feel safe "coming out." But I don't blame Dave. At the end of two days of a very surreal existence I always feel a bit short with all the merchants, freaks and fairies who are trying to come onto me too.

It's weird coming back to a normal existence after a few days in the twilight zone. I'm not sure which I like better. My life as an office worker is a bit too mundane for me. It drains all the happiness right out of my days. But the life of a carnie is far too surreal and leaves me feeling bent and warped while trying to transition back into the realm of the normal.