Aliens
My God, sometimes I seriously think I was raised on another planets from my parents. Where in God's name did these people come from? Or, I suppose the better question is, where did *I* come from, after being around *them* for so long? Ugh. Now that I've talked to them about study abroad and heard their indifference (except on a financial level) and listened to them try to convince me that I won't get anything out of going to Japan, the last thing I want to do is go home for spring break and spend time with them. I can't even talk to them. They refuse to entertain me as a person. I'm simply a goal, a career model, an ideal.

Fuck, I don't know why their opinion upsets me so much. Like their advice has any value when I look at them and dread living their lives. When dad tells me that I should be keeping my career path in mind instead of going off on "Adventures," I want to say, "Thanks, dad, I'll keep that in mind the next time I want to end up in a worthless job, clinically depressed about my life, wondering why I never did anything, just like you." NO ONE ELSE I've talked to about study abroad has been so close-minded and unsupportive. Not strangers, not friends, not my partner whom I'm leaving to go on "walkabout." My parents can't even understand and won't discuss my reasons for going. So, mom and dad, while you may not be crack addicts or abusive parents, in my mind you're terrible role models. At least I have you to thank for showing me what not to become. So fucking sorry I don't have a concrete career plan, a spouse picked out, and a white picket fence in mind. I'd rather find something that matters more than (what did dad say?) "making something" of myself. I'm going to be making MYSELF of myself, something the rest of the god damn country has forgotten in their quest to raise the bar for material satisfaction.

Does anyone want to come with me and start a close commune of people who care about finding themselves? A place where people can HAVE jobs they like and LEAVE them at any time? A place where one can buy Pottery Barn furniture OR Good Will gear just because it suits their taste and doesn't really make them feel better about themselves? A place where there's a great big open door for travel and a huge capacity for adventure? A place to come home to after exploring the ends of this great big world? A place to LIVE instead of a place to DIE? A place where children will be happy? Where money is whatever you make of it? A place to love being yourself?

Let's make it happen.