cocktail & karma
I woke up at 9:30 this morning.Yes, 9:30 after going to bed at 4:15 AM. When I finally collapsed this evening against sheer force of will, I felt like a panicked, delerious drug addict when I woke up. I had the shakes.

I didn't drink too much last night. Not enough, at first, even. Then I finally figured out that I needed to have a few more shots to get me to the point where I wouldn't be too paranoid about people not having fun and the neighbors being upset. Everyone showed up around 9:30 or 10, as I thought they would, and most everyone was in some state of formal attire. Two guys even came in tuxxes, and there were many FABULOUS ladies in skirts and dresses.

I felt guilty for not being more social, as I was either busy being hostessy or feeling withdrawn and trying to shake my feeling of doom. Anyway, unless I'm mistaken, that fatalistic feeling was all for nothing. Only two unfortunate events transpired the whole evening. The first was that Sara cut her finger pretty badly before the party and left for the hospital to get stitches after being social for a little while. As they left, she said "we'll be back!" Going to get stitches... I thought, And they'll be back?? But they did come back, to my surprise, and with four stitches. A scar is a good v-day souvenir, I think.

There was another unfortunate incident with an apartment security employee around 1:30 AM (I think? correct me if I'm wrong, could have been later). Alex and I were sitting on the steps outside the apartment talking quietly when she strolled by, peering up into the windows of the apartments. I was pretty drunk but I can fake sober relatively easily, so I took a chance and tried to help her. "Can I help you, miss?" I asked. She told me she was looking for the fourth apartment from the right or something because she had recieved a noise complaint. From her confused demeanor, I could tell that it wasn't apparent that it was our apartment which the noise was issuing from. Frankly, people weren't being that noisy and the only noise coming from an open window was from two people in the front room. Regardless, I felt I should ask her if it was from our gathering and she got a bit persnickety about noise curfew being at 10 and asked me to tell everyone to leave. I was a little upset but I asked her who it was who had issued the complaint and told her that we made sure all the neighbors whose walls were against our apartment had been given our phone numbers to contact us if we were loud. She said it was someone out walking their dog who had called. What? Some midnight insomniac upset because they weren't having fun, too? Sheesh, happy Valentines day, pal. I didn't want to get in trouble with her or the police, since a good number of minors (myself included) were at the party, so I went back in the house, turned off the music, and told everyone she was requesting they vacate. I also told Justin to go out and speak with her because I was upset and too inebriated to try and reason with her without making it obvious we'd been drinking.

He did, and came back five minutes later to tell us once I had closed the windows, the security woman couldn't even tell what the fuss was about. And, she admitted, she wasn't even sure it was our apartment the complaint was issued for... though I'm sure it was. Anyway, she said we didn't have loud music and we weren't being obnoxious, so she said she'd leave and let us know if anyone else mentioned the noise, we would have to vacate. I didn't think it would be a problem, we'd only had the windows open to let the heat out anyway. I think Justin just charmed her into leaving. She probably realized it wasn't some typical college trasher party when he came out in slacks and a tie. I probably just confused her, I was wearing a men's coat over my dress and men's shoes. It probably looked like I didn't have any clothes on.

It seemed like everyone had a really good time-- and they ate all the food! This makes me pleased to no end. I'm really glad my Martha Stewart hostess neurosis didn't go to waste. It often seems like food is neglected at parties and I didn't want the expenses to go to waste. We made out extremely well with donations and alcohol. There are over 30 kinds of liquor in the fridge, in the freezer, and on top of the cabinet. We ended up with a whole lot of JUICE left over, and some random fixings (olives, heavy cream, evaporated milk, pineapples, coconut cream, etc) that we probably can never use up. Thankfully, some of it is unopened. Nobody had bloody mary's so I have a whole thing of V8 all for me. MUAHAHAHA.

With all this excess, I think I may take to having a cocktail with my evening of Wasted Time on the Internet. Maybe it will give my life purpose.

In any case, nothing remarkably extraordinary or memorable happened to make this party as notorious as our others. The last party landed us mention in the Portland Mercury's "top 25" mentioned in their annual sex survey under the response section for "What was the sexiest thing that happened to you this year?" Ok, it wasn't the sexiest thing that happened to ME (but I'd say it rates up there as far as out-of-the-ordinary experiences) and it wasn't the housewarming party, it was my birthday party... but it was definitely worth a mention. This party was special in its own way for being so delightfully yuppie. I think it was a GRAND success-- Martinis, fire in the fireplace, jazz, Hot toddies, some smoking on the porch and a good deal of social schmoozing.

We're already thinking of what to do next term (since we seem to have one with about that frequency). We have two ideas for the next one: a toga party here when it's warmer in late spring or a party at Justin's parent's beachhouse in Rockaway. Votes, anyone?

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I got up "early" this morning after the postponed Valentines day romp (yesterday was too damn busy to frolic) and picked up Alex and Nate to attend the Peace Rally and march. We were a bit late to the march due to unfortunate events involving stupid busses and sports fans attending a basketball game that got more coverage than the rally. So we had to run to catch up with the march... which wasn't too difficult given how slowly large herds of people move. But we had to Power Walk for Peace with the Feet of Destiny to make sure we got there, and then we infiltrated their ranks.

The rally had some excellent speakers and we were close to the front of the crowd so we had a nice view of the podium (I mean, when it wasn't blocked by a stupid sign). We were even on the 6 o'clock news! There wasn't much civil disobedience except from a small crowd that went off on a second march before the rally was over. The rest of us stuck around and encircled the Federal Building singing "We will overcome" and chanting (weakly). But it was an experience to remember, if just because I know that when I'm older, my life will be defined by times like these. Over 4,000 people (a good chunk of the population of Eugene) turned out for the rally. Seeing all the faces, young and old, gave me extreme hope for the world... but hearing everything the speakers had to say just made me more depressed. I remember being a child and so disconnected from the world. I didn't have to worry. I like being an adult and trying to make a difference but sometimes I wonder if I really matter... I miss not knowing that the world can seem this hurtful and confusing. Where are our jobs, our education, our children, our money all going? Where will this war (I really believe it inevitable) take us? Where is our sense of trust, of intimacy, of privacy, of diversity? Where is love in all this?

It's too much to think about.

The rally ran a bit long and by the time it was done, we were all hungry and really tired so we went out for Pho noodles and hopped back to campus. That new store, Big Monkey Card and Gifts (where the other flower shop used to be on 13th), totally rules. All of you from around here ought to go check it out, it cracks me up. I can't explain what it carries, really, it's too eclectic to classify. You just have to see it. It's right out of downtown Portland.

Oh, and Murray, we decided that you are most definitely a necromancer, though that doesn't say anything against your character. But just tell us when you plan to unleash your legions of undead minions so we can flee, ok?

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The rain is back. Spring is coming. We're all here. We're all alive. We're all waiting. So when is the shit going to hit the fan?