grunt.
My boyfriend is currently ill.

It's strange because it's the first time he's been sick since I've known him and I feel horrible because I think I gave it to him. Granted, it's not nearly as awful as the time Alex gave my whole family some version of the Black Plague, but it's still annoying. It must have been the stress... of going to class, of being unemployed, of having an awful, self-involved girlfriend. (<= that's me)

I'm sympathetic. I know how terrible it is to be sick after being the "healthy one" for so long. And he hasn't asked for a pity party. A good thing, because I'm too busy to throw him one. I really want to spend time fawning over him, but I haven't any time to dedicate to simple self-maintenance for the moment being.

I haven't even really been getting that much sleep lately. Which brings me to the point of the entry. Since he's been ill, Justin has started doing this THING... this sleeping THING.... that might make my head explode.

Every night, he wanders off to bed some twenty or thirty minutes (or an hour) before I can even begin to think about finishing my homework. It takes him a while to get to sleep most nights, so this often equates to me getting in bed and us falling asleep at about the same time. Since he's been sick, though, he's been zonking out rather quickly.

And that's when it starts. It's a peculiar groaning, a low, almost sympathy-enducing noise. It's endearing in the sort of way that sleeping puppy-grumbles are. But he does it on every exhale. Like a snore, or sleep apnea, except that his breath is just vocally pushed out. So I calm him and poke him and tell him it's ok (since it really is a pathetic, painful noise) but he seems to be at peace, asleep, and not in any pain. Eventually, I give up, roll over, and attempt to sleep. I'm lucky-- I usually succeed.

But it's so weird. He's been groaning for the last week almost, every night like clockwork. He stops, eventually, probably when he goes into REM sleep. But he does it for a while, stopping and starting but mostly a constant inhale....groooooooaaanningexhale.... inhale....

I think it's his body's way of saying "piiiity meeeee." I feel terrible, listening to him cough wrackingly in the evenings, not quite ill enough to see a doctor but not well enough to be getting better, either.

*shakes head* The whole sick boyfriend thing is freaking me out. It's just not natural, I tell you! I must exorcise the demon aliens from Justin's body before they actually start speaking while I'm falling asleep or (god forbid!!) evolve into a SNORE.