Aahhh Random Insanity
Haha, it's working...
Right, well... maybe I write in this too much but unexpectedly it's turned out to bee a good thing. I don't think I've ever been so sucessful in keeping track of random thoughts as I am now. I'm supposed to turn in some freaking journal for VisComm; I might just give the teacher this address... it's certainly more portable than my notebook. (eh, I spend most of my day in front of a glowing screen anyway) I'm having so many good random thoughts lately that I'll be posting a lot. Not that I really care if anyone reads, this is for me. But it's still cool to share.

First on the agenda today, Music. I'm not sure, I might be in the wrong area (writing).. mebby I should concentrate on music or choir or maybe, I think it might be fun to make music videos. There is no way to describe the importance of music in my life. I saw a bumper sticker last night by the school of music that said "music is life, the rest is details." I'm not so sure about that, a lot of the time, but when I'm listening to something really moving, I completely agree. Music is where I derive my power and, if I'm in the right physical/ mental mindset, it takes me somewhere and shows me things. It's really hard to explain but I really do see things when I'm involved in a piece of music, be it something classical or a really loud techno track. I see colors, I see the levels of melody and harmony, I see rhythm spinning and moving and then the song becomes alive. Music tells me stories about my life... for the lack of a better analogy, I see a story overlay. Usually it involves me and other people that are close to me and involved in my energies. With that said, I'd like to note that actually the most important part of this page is the section directly left of the top posts, where I display the "Lyrics of the Moment." These are often all the things I can write, or subtext to the things that I do. More important than the little smiley that denotes mood. That's bullshit, it's in the music. I've always wondered if anyone else has visualized music like I do. I was Geiss before Geiss was on my computer. I've always wondered if I were hooked up to electrodes while "in trance," if there would be some super level of brain activity. I wonder.... And I have this (ARRGH) song stuck in my head... I know the chorus and I don't know the name of the song. It's poppy alterna-rock, something they play on DMX when I'm at the Rec center... something I need to post here, but I CAN'T figure out the name of the song! There are too many songs out there with similar lyrics combos so Google isn't any help at all. Meh.

Speaking of music, or not. I watched American Pie again a couple nights ago. The first time I watched it, it was the "uncensored" version and it got interrupted like a million times... this was the regular lame-ass one. The whole movie is INDESCRIBABLY STUPID. Much more stupid than the last time I watched it. I know it's "supposed" to be stupid, but I still hate it. I wanted to castrate all those guys.ANYWAY..... err... what I was getting at is some more suble irony. So, remember that one guy who joins Jazz choir and actually "falls in love" with the chick from American Beauty? It struck me as kind of hilarious that they were participating in a jazz choir in Michigan and singing songs like "how sweet it is to be loved by you." I found this funny because I used to go to high school in Michigan and the choir that I was in has taken state every year for the past.... god... 20 years? So that would have been our chamber and concert choirs up there with the "American Pie" weenie choir kicking their sorry asses in Lansing. Heh heh.

Third, I feel like a moron. I get all weirdy and meloncholy because no one knows me around here, and then all these people say hi to me and I have NO idea who the fuck they are! Do I lead two lives? In the night, when I have whacked dreams, am I really living them? (that would be nice, wouldn't it?) Who are these people and WHY CAN'T I REMEMBER WHERE I MET THEM??? Arrrgggghhh.... and then I usually say "hi" back and just kind of deedle along whilst my brain is wracking itself... or I have to apologize for my idiocy and admit my sudden amnesia. Sometimes, after they TELL me, I STILL don't remember. That's why I was surprised when, over break, I recognized my flight attendant as the guy that drove Justin and I to prom. IT IS SUCH A SMALL WORLD. I WISH MY BRAIN WORKED BETTER... =P

[there was just a dog in my office...] I always assumed people who used Unix had to know something about computers because, to me, it seems to much more complicated to learn and use. Well, I was wrong. How disappointing.