it helps, sometimes, looking back
Even with all this stress, which-- per the norm-- is panning out to be less than anticipated, I'm in a state where I've never been at the start of a UO schoolyear:

I'm emotionally and mentally stable.

Let's see..

Freshman year, I'd just gone through the breakup of my first love relationship, about 3 years long, started a new relationship, and was living in the same dorm complex as my ex. My angst-ridden, intellectualite attitude was NOT well offset by my rich, catholic, good-girl roomie.

Sophomore year, I'd just moved into a rental house with three practical strangers, was in a total state of anal retention, found out one roomate was a total bitch, was left to do all the work on the house, was still depressed over aforementioned breakup and to top it ALL off, took a Depo Provera shot and downward spiralled into a dark, dark place for three months. That was a long winter.

Junior year, I was three months into living in a new apartment with Justin, confused about our relationship, still torn up over the two-years-prior breakup and trying to manage acting as the publisher of a campus magazine which was staffed largely by a bunch of circus monkeys. Woo-hoo.

Senior year, I was... uh. I was in Tokyo. I think "WTF?" best sums up what was going through my head.

This year I'm in a nice place with good roomates, surrounded by friends, have finally resolved all emotional baggage with my ex-- also a good friend and just yesterday celebrated four-and-a-half-years with Justin. I'm practicing being more "present" and enjoying the Now. I just bought two small succulent plants to go on my windowsill with the other eight plants in my room, because nothing makes me happier than growing things. My twenty-second birthday is next Saturday.

Life is good.