TOXICITY
I've been thinking a lot lately about doing a cleansing fast. The idea crept into my mind earlier this summer as a sort of entertained curiosity and grew as I considered the sort of lack of clarity plaguing me. Before we left for Glacier, I was pleased to see that Anna, whose weblog I read, was beginning her own ten-day fast. I wondered if it might be a bit extreme but after asking Tim and Beverly about their multi-yearly fasts, I was pretty convinced that there wouldn't be any adverse effects. When I came back and read Anna's account of her experience (she's on day 17 or 18 now, actually), I was even more impressed. I don't have any desire to go much longer than a week, though the fast may be taken for up to forty days. We'll see how I feel if I actually do it. Worst case scenario, I figure, is that I stop.

The purpose of the fast is a physical and emotional cleansing. The physical aspect catalyzes the emotional cleansing which is also amplified by the changes in lifestyle accompanying the fast. You consume very little during the fast (hence the term fast), primarily fruit juices, water, supplements, and detoxifying agents. All this aids your body in releasing all the built-up toxins within organs, intestines, and cell walls. Most of this comes out through the skin and as poo. Icky, icky, poo.

Basically, you start out by getting a gigantic enema (hydrotherapy colonic). The first one, at least, is highly recommended. Despite most people's trepidation and having ... stuff... up there... I don't really consider this an invasive procedure, nor would I balk at having it done at least once. I found a specialist in Eugene who performs the procedure and though it's slightly expensive (in the range of $70 for the first), I think it would be worth it. That and I've also read that it's easy enough to do it yourself with the proper kit (not just a garden hose, yo)...though I'm not sure I believe it or trust myself to try. (Dontcha love ass-talk??!?) In any case, before that internal cleansing you start the fast easy by cutting out meat and dairy and eating mostly whole fruits and fish for two days prior. Drink lots of water. After the colonic, it's time for the full-fledged fast to begin. At this point, consume only liquids (some fruit juices ok) but mostly mixtures of water and detoxifying agents. Particular mixtures and supplements have the effect of expanding in the stomach and intestines so there's not a constant hunger. I've also heard from every single person who's done this that days two and three are the hardest particularly because it takes that long for the stomach to shrink and for hunger to subceed. During those first two days the body is particularly prone to negative effects from high doses of toxins releasing from the sustem.

The daily regimen is to take the supplements and juice mixtures about four times a day (which makes you pretty regular). Beverly also recommended taking hot-cold-hot-cold showers at least twice a day to release toxins through the skin and most sources I've looked at suggest a colonic or two every day. I guess I can't afford that but we'll see what happens when I consult the lady in Eugene. Mebby she'll cut me a deal for promoting her on the weblog .

Anyway, so I guess what I'm anticipating is the feeling of clarity and well-being that comes with the fast. Everyone seems to suggest that hunger is non-existent, energy levels are high, there's no desire to consume bad foods, skin clears up, dreams become lucid, days are spent euphoric and physical condition improves drastically. Doesn't sound bad to me. Though it's not all cake; apparently the release of toxins can cause nausea, rashes, etc but is resolved by colonics or the hot-cold showers to flush the toxins from the system.

I'm sure I sound like a wanna-be holistic hippie but these effects are exactly what I'm looking for. I need to get this cotton out of my brain and I don't think it's going away on its own. I had a few moments of clarity in Glacier, especially during the purification and initiation rituals I did outdoors and while on mountaintops. But moments like those pass quickly. I'd also really like to know what it feels like to fast, to know my body more in that way. Don't get me wrong, I'm not interested instarvation or weight loss here (god knows I don't need to lose any more weight). I feel the need to understand my body, how it moves, how it feels when it's empty or full, how it feels to be weak and strong, tired and awake, muddled and clear. There's a big blank spot in my knowledge here when it comes to cleansing. I want to understand how to realign my poles. I'm taking TaiChi to help with that (may keep the class) and the fast sounds really appealing. I'm a little concerned it'll interfere with my daily life, especially when things pick up and get really busy, so I'll investigate more and start within the next two weeks if I can find what I need.

I hope this helps.

Someone buy me a Light Box, I hate the fucking clouds. It's so dark here already.